i have secrets that i haven't told. i have climbed without falling. i'm waiting and it's not coming and now i've no plans. i've cried and hidden in corners and somehow you don't care. you just think i want to do this, want to be sad every day. how can that even be plausible? how can you even ... i've tried to end it so i won't be so sad. i fucking hate this, this constant bearing down, this constant rejection.
fuck this. i can't help it. i think nothing but positive, and look at what's happened.